There Aren't Enough Cuss Words to Describe How I Feel

...about Ben and Jerry's selling out and doing an exclusive flavor with Walmart for Walmart Super Centers. Super Center!?!? Seriously the only time I've ever seen Supercenters are in rural or semi rural locations where they've blown away all the local mom and pop grocery/hardware/knickknack stores. Secondly, it's Walmart. WALMART?!? Yes, the Walmart that has a record of treating its own employees like crap giving them such small salaries that they can only afford to shop at Walmart. The same Walmart that refuses to give its employee healthcare or allow them to unionize and the very same Walmart that takes down small businesses at any cost/price. Yeah THAT Walmart.

Sigh. I'm so disappointed with B&J right about now. Not only do I dislike Walmart immensely but even if I didn't feel as strongly as I did about them, there are no Supercenters near me so I can't even try this new flavor and well that as a life long Ben and Jerry's lover that really sucks. It sucks hard.

So thanks for a whole lot of nothing Ben and Jerry's. Way to keep a loyal fan(s) happy.

A Quick Lactose Update

The lactose intolerance test came back positive. Explains a lot. However, doesn't explain the odd skin rashes. I still believe those are wheat related so I'm gonna ask for the blood test.

Even though I was really sad to get the test results back positive, I decided that it's not gonna keep me from living my life. For example, I had ice cream last night and didn't seem to have any issues. I have skim milk in my coffee today and everything seems good. I did skip the cheese from my egg/bacon croissant because 1.) I didn't want to press my luck 2.) I don't really care for the melted plastic texture on my sandwich.

I think I'll just be mindful of what I eat, how much I eat...Besides, isn't that what we're all suppose to do anyway?

Thanks for all the support everyone!

Wait, I thought milk was suppose to do a body good?

I'm sorry I haven't seen posting much lately. My work life has truly eaten up time, space and energy for little else. I'm trying to get an online shop for Jean Therapy up and have another little pet side project in the works as well. Sometimes I consider blogging but my meals and life with food really haven't been anything too special these days.

I've been trying to make peace with my issues with wheat. It's been tough. Anytime E had anything with bread involved, I ask to take a sniff before she digs in. And I take a deep inhalation. Sometimes I have a little nibble. Even a hotdog bun causes me to go into rapture. I miss bread so damn much that it all seems so damn unfair. If only I had known how truly "unfair" it was about to get.

Recently I had a doctor's appointment. I remembered to mention my stomach issues to her and she instantly scheduled a lactose test for me. I was a little taken aback. I mean, I'm Korean and all but I'm also adopted so I've had a glass of milk with every meal since I could remember. Dairy in the form of cheese and ice cream are a daily requirement for me; my cheese bin in the fridge is always stocked so I can have a quick snack and don't even get me started on the gallons of ice cream I typically have on hand.

When I came home and told E, we both thought the same thing. Perhaps, not really meaning to, my doctor had kinda stererotyped me as being lactose intolerant because I'm Asian. No matter, I'd go ahead with the test. It would be one more thing to rule out for me to be allergic to.

The test is a breathorlizer dealie and one that takes three hours to administer. Also, you can't have anything to eat or drink for 10 hrs before and this includes water. Since I was having the test in the morning I was able to sleep for most of the 10 hrs. But the period from 9-12 was a little rough because this was my typical midnight snacking time. E will have a glass of wine or bourbon and I reach for ice cream. Actually it's probably not the healthiest evening routine and I think we both might want to reevaluate.

I arrived for the test early. I was parched, cranky, tired and my breath was a little funky because I couldn't use "a lot" of water to brush my teeth and absolutely no Listerine. "Why, did I decide this was a good idea? I already KNOW I'm not allergic to lactose". I fumed and chided myself for going along with the test.

Soon I and four other people were ushered into a room and given clear keg cups half full of what looked like water. These were the lactose/sucrose solutions and we were told to drink the entire portion. I took a small sip thru my straw and deemed it not so bad. It was tepid and slightly sweet.

"Well, it could be worse", I thought as I proceeded to try and down the rest of the solution.

Okay, a few more sips into the beverage and I changed my mind. It was disgusting. Drinking lukewarm sugar water is really not fun at all. It was a lot to stomach and I was having trouble downing it all. I kinda felt like a wuss until I looked around the room at the four other people. They didn't look too happy either. Infact, the woman next to me said, "blah, this is awful!".

So armed with the knowledge that I wasn't the only one suffering, I pulled thru and emptied the cup. Every 30 mins for 3 hours we had to come back to the room and blow into the plastic bag. So for 3 hours, I played with my phone (the day that Twitter went down! drats!), watch the Today show and marveled over how many times they recycled the same damn new stories and internally kicked myself for taking the test when I was so not lactose intolerant.

But the reason for kicking myself changed about 20 mins after I chugged whatever was in the cup. My tummy was a mess. I was in a bit of pain and had some GI distress. F-ck! And it didn't stop. My tummy was a mess all day and into the evening as well. Damn me for taking a test that made me so sick!

I haven't gotten the test results back but I'm fairly certain that my test will come back positive and I am indeed lactose intolerant. My GI distress was almost immediate.

While the possibility of being both lactose and wheat intolerant really bums me out, I'm also trying to figure out how to move forward. People have told me that there are plenty of substitutes for wheat and cheese. Plus I know my friend V uses the lactose pills so he can easily handle the cheese on a cheeseburger. And I know that this is true but I also wonder if the best course of action, for me, not for anyone else, is to clean those foods out of my diet completely and see how I feel. I'm tempted to do the latter but I'm also baffled by what to eat, especially as someone who is so wedded to cheese and ice cream. And yes, I've had rice milk and soy milk ice cream and I don't really enjoy either one very much. And sorbet?! I mean it's got a place but sometimes you just want a big ole ice cream sundae or a vanilla creme brulee.

Alright, so I'm being a little pouty about the entire situation and I recognize that. Besides, if all this had come up for me years ago, I'm sure that I wouldn't have the world of alternatives and subs I have at my disposal now. And you know what? Pecan crackers aren't really half bad so maybe I'll be ok afterall.

It's Food Related...Kinda.

One of my favorite trashy shows is Bridezillas on WE. It's basically a reality show of Brides who've gone completely bonkers trying to plan their "big" day. I think I love it because as insane as life makes me, I'd never act the way these ladies do. But gosh darn it, sometimes I really wish I could let go and just go bonkers too!

I've watched many episodes over the years but his is perhaps the best scene I've ever seen and yes it does involve food ;)

Enjoy!

I Concur, Well Sorta Kinda

While catching up on my Serious Eats reading, I stumbled upon the ultimate New England ice cream guide. It was a collaboration with Roadfooddigest.com, a website I hadn't ever checked out before. I was fairly impressed with the guide and definitely agreed with Sundae School sitting on the top of the list. A long, long, long time ago, when I was still in college, I spent a summer working in Orleans. The summer there was a food extravaganza for me! Besides the amazing and abundant seafood, there were other delights that were specific to Orleans. On rare days off we'd get tender, flaky (almost biscuit like) homemade scones from Fancy Farms and in the evenings hit Sundae School.

The Sundae School was always swamped with a line of customers that seemed to stretch out forever. People tended to be fairly anxious about getting their chance of some great ice cream but were never terribly chatting in line. I remember waiting in line, in anguish sometimes, because the wooded area by Sundae School was a home for gi-normous mosquitoes. But what's a couple 100 itchy bites on my legs when there is rich, creamy homemade ice cream to enjoy. I remember the sundaes (with real whipped cream) being fantastic (of course). But my favorite had to be the peach ice cream. Some nights it wasn't there and I'd pick something else. Honestly all the ice cream flavors were really great. But the peach ice cream was something different all together. Chunks of fresh peach with a ice cream that was peach scented...so deeply peach scented that sometimes it always seemed floral to me rather that fruity. It wasn't like eating a fresh frozen peach, it was 1000 times better because there was ice cream involved too.

Lucky for me I had two jobs that summer so I burned off most of what I ate. Even back then I was a total workaholic and foodie!

Anyway, the Sundae School definitely would top my list too. But the one rating I can't really get behind is Emack and Bolio. In Orleans, it tended to be our second tier ice cream place. If the Sundae School line got to us or if the mosquitoes were especially bad, we'd hit up E&B. It was okay, not great, but okay. Since moving to Boston, I've tried two other Emack and Bolios and both of them were pretty awful. I got a very grainy chocolate ice cream at the Newbury street location and an ice filled vanilla bean at the new one at Trilogy. Not cool, so not cool at all! So I can't really see how JP licks fell one star behind E&B. I have to say I'm a fan of JP Licks...okay, it ain't no Sundae School but their mint chip is decent and their waffle cones also come dipped in dark chocolate. Mmmm...

The only other comment I would make is that there might have also been a category for cost. Ice cream in Boston has become ridiculously expensive. Yet, when I get out to the 'burbs with a friend with a car and get ice cream, it's insane to me how cheap it seems. Are suburban cows just cheaper? Or is it that keeping a cow in the city is a bit too costly and expensive? Who knows but this is part of the appeal of certain places (i.e. Christina's) and part of the turn off (Toscanini's) for others. I'm just sayin'.

Maybe one day I can talk a friend with a car into driving me back to Orleans for a day....that's a thought.